Book Series: Byrnehouse-Davies & Hamilton Saga
Publishing Date: 1996
Author: Anita Stansfield
Publisher: Covenant Communications, Inc.
Category: LDS Contemporaray Romance
Point of View: Third Person, limited, Sean and Tara
Chapter Count: 16
Page Count: 261
Point of View: Third Person, limited, Sean and Tara
Chapter Count: 16
Page Count: 261
To Vince, with all my
love…forever.
And a special
thank-you to Crystal Bloodworth, for your example and your experience.
Prologue
Meet Sean O'Hara (in case you missed the last book) from Chicago, Illinois. Sean grew up in a very strict, domineering, Irish Catholic household with parents who wouldn't let him do anything fun which drove him to move out at nineteen and cohabitate with a woman. He started drinking and doing drugs until the car accident that changed his life. He met two Mormon missionaries, joined the church and did a complete about-face and while his saintly mother was accepting of his new lifestyle, his mean old father declared him disowned and as good as dead. Sean's response was to pack up everything he owned and move himself to Utah where he could attend BYU and live the "good-boy" life in peace. Now he just needs to find a wife...
Chapter 1- Sean is sitting in the library on campus trying to study but can't keep his eyes off a lovely young woman sitting alone at the next table, intent on her books. She looks familiar with long red-gold hair and wholesome appearance. Sean realizes he's seen her around campus and they even have a class together. He is determined to talk to her but can't work up his courage. A few weeks pass. It is now October and Sean is eating pizza with his friends when that same girl enters the restaurant with her date. They sit at the next table and Sean is able to overhear their conversation where it becomes obvious this guy is a jerk. Sean takes the first opportunity to approach the table and tell this girl she could do much better. He walks away before she can answer.
Taralee Parr spots Sean in the library the following Monday and can't help but notice how attractive he is with dark curly hair, blue eyes and strong features. Encouraged by his words at the pizza parlor, she marches up to his table and agrees to go out with him that Friday night. Sean arrives at Tara's apartment to pick her up. He's nervous around her giggly roommates and Tara is condescending towards him but the tension eases as the date progresses. Tara and Sean find they have much in common. Sean gives Tara a very watered down version of how he joined the church and enrolled at BYU. Tara, in turn, tells Sean that "jerk" from the pizza parlor is Danny and she's only seeing him because he's the only boy, in the two years she's been here, to ask her out (because the single boy-to-girl ratio at BYU sucks). She was named for Gone With the Wind which is both her and her mother's favorite movie. She's impressed by Sean's strong testimony, his deep respect for his Irish heritage, and his ambition to graduate with a master's degree. Sean works at the local sanatorium counseling troubled youth and adults. We are never told what Tara's major is. The chemistry is hot between them. Sean asks her out for tomorrow and Tara eagerly accepts.
They have the best time of their lives the next day and that night, Sean brings Tara home to his one bedroom apartment where he lives alone. He presents her with a single rose. Tara is flattered and allows him to kiss her. Angelic choirs sing and fireworks explode as they experience their first kiss. Sean makes a THIRD date for Sunday and, once again, they end up spending the entire day together, attending church at Tara's ward because she has Relief Society duties, cooking and eating their Sunday dinner at Sean's apartment before attending a fireside that evening. Walking Tara to her door, Sean is ready to turn his life upside down and marry this incredible woman but Tara has to go out with Danny one last time, a school play they're required to see for a humanities class credit, but she promises Sean she's going to officially break up with him that night so they can be exclusive.
Chapter 2- Sean phones Tara the next night and when he learns she was thinking of taking a short walk, alone, comes right over to join her. Sean can't shake this foreboding that something awful is going to happen if Tara keeps her date with Danny. Tara teases him about being jealous.
The next night, Tara is already beginning to wish she'd taken Sean's advice as she realizes she and Danny have nothing in common. During intermission, Tara mentions she's met someone and can't wait to get more serious. Danny is cold and silent as he drives her home. Unexpectedly, he turns onto a canyon road and drives several miles at a dangerous speed while Tara pleads for him to turn around and take her home. He pulls over and sexually assaults her with a kiss that would put Christian Grey to shame.
Tara jumps out and tries to run but Danny tackles her, physically restrains her and has his way with her. He literally dumps Tara on the strip of lawn outside her apartment and speeds away while Tara is still trying to overcome the shock and horror of what just happened.
Despite all her resolve to remain morally clean, chaste and modest, she has been defiled. Despite all her efforts to fight Danny off, ("No" really did mean "No" in this case) he sneered at her in the car and told her no one would believe her word against his and Tara knows Danny is right. She is too humiliated. No one must ever find out.
She stumbles into her apartment, grateful all her roommates are asleep and that the girl she shares her bedroom with is out of town visiting family for the week so she can crawl into bed and cry herself to sleep. She barricades herself in her room all the following Wednesday, telling everyone she has the flu and just wants to be left alone so she can sleep it off.
Meanwhile, Sean didn't sleep a wink last night. Tara didn't show up for class that day and won't come to the phone. He goes to bed, reflecting on the worst period of his life when drugs, alcohol and cohabitation messed up his life before he got into that woman's car on that fatal night, both of them very drunk.
Chapter 3- Tara does talk to her mom when she calls Thursday morning but continues to lie and say she has the flu. Her family lives in Colorado on a sheep ranch and she is a lifelong member of the church. Sean also comes knocking that day while everyone is out but Tara won't let him in, pleading her zombie-like appearance might scare him away. She promises she'll be in class tomorrow.
Noticing her shiner, Sean corners Tara after Friday's class and Tara breaks down, sobbing in his arms while Sean guides her outside to his truck. He drives her to his apartment so they can talk.
He loves her (yes, he's the first one to say it). He's been worried sick about her. This was no flu. Tara has every textbook symptom of a rape victim: bruises on her neck and wrists, anxiety, depression, every time he tries to get close and learn the truth she becomes aggressive, like a wounded animal.
Tara sobs and sobs, insisting Danny got physically aggressive with her, knocked her around a little and when she insisted he take her home, he did. That's all that happened and she'll never see him again. It's over and Tara just wants to forget the whole thing.
Tara cries herself out and finally allows Sean to take her in his arms and hold her tenderly. It is past lunchtime. Sean goes out to get some food and cries, alone, in his truck, for the woman he loves who did nothing wrong and is hurting for no good reason. He resists the urge to hunt Danny down and avenge his Tara.
Chapter 4- Sean returns with pizza, drinks and a dozen pink roses. They eat and watch Gone With the Wind. Tara can feel the healing beginning already thanks to Sean's gentle concern and care. He still wants to marry her and Tara finds herself believing it might actually happen.
Sean takes her home, it is very late, but her roommates are all up entertaining the one and only single college boy in their complex they could coerce into joining them for dinner and a round of Monopoly on a Friday night (Why date one when you can hang out with them all? Elder Oaks famous talk-given ten years too late!) Sean makes a date for tomorrow and Tara accepts because, apparently, she has no other life outside BYU, like a job.
Chapter 5- Sean picks Tara up early that Saturday morning and they drive to Temple Square in Salt Lake City. Sean parks at Crossroads Mall (torn down in 2007 and replaced by City Creek Center) where they browse stores and eat lunch in the food court on the lowest level. They tour Temple Square, view the large Christus statue in the North visitors center and feel the spirit.
Over dinner at a nice restaurant, Sean opens up about the choices he made and the lifestyle he led before the car accident that led him to join the church and turn his life around. Tara knows she's found a keeper.
Back at her apartment, Sean breaks an important BYU honor code rule and hangs out in Tara's bedroom, unchaperoned, while her roommates lounge in the front room, watching TV and studying. They make a date for church tomorrow, Sean's ward this time. Tara sees him out where she allows Sean to give her a chaste kiss on her forehead. What a sweetheart.
By November, these two have become inseparable. Sean fixes Tara's car. Tara is given a key and practically lives at Sean's cooking his meals and welcoming him home after a long day of classes or work but she keeps her own bed at her apartment. Their relationship will remain platonic until their wedding night but they enjoy kissing and cuddling as Tara's vulnerability dissipates. One day, Sean suggests they spend the rest of their lives together. Realizing her new name will sound very silly, Tara teases Sean O'Hara with timid hesitation at accepting before she admits he had her at hello. She's in love and ready to move on. She'll go by Taralee for the record. They kiss and the nightmare of Danny is the furthest thing from Tara's mind.
Chapter 6- The Friday before Thanksgiving, Tara wakes up with morning sickness. When it happens again the next day there's no denying it. She's pregnant and Danny is the father.
Tara leaves the apartment and starts walking in the freezing sleet. She ends up at Sean's apartment, soaking wet. Sean orders her into a hot shower, finds dry clothes that fit her small frame and helps her dry her hair with the blow dryer (How many single men in the 90's owned a hair dryer?). It's a very romantic gesture as he stands behind her, letting his fingers toy in her long curls but his attempt to brush her hair quickly becomes awkward until Tara wordlessly takes over.
Now it's time to talk and it doesn't take much prodding from Sean to get the truth out of Tara who has another meltdown. For the first time in the novel the word "rape" is spoken aloud after Sean puts two and two together. He's furious with Danny while Tara howls her grief in his arms before running to the bathroom to be sick.
Both manage to calm down and discuss the situation rationally. Tara's mom phones looking for her daughter and Tara knows she's lucky to have a mother so in tune with the spirit. She'll continue to withhold the truth from her family and roommates but knows she'll have to start talking soon. Sean is a good place to start and Tara finally opens up and tells him everything that happened that night. He's got her back, repeating over and over that this is not her fault; he still loves her and wants to be with her. The baby is due in July and abortion is out but Tara is open to adoption. Sean will support her whatever decision she makes and be there every step of the way.
Chapter 7- Tara cries herself to sleep in Sean's arms and wakes up in his bed while Sean took the couch (proving that in the world of Anita Stansfield, chivalry is not dead). Around 3am Sean hears Tara groaning in the throngs of a nightmare. He wakes her. At first she is frightened and disoriented, fighting him off before collapsing in his arms, sobbing, while Sean whispers soothing, comforting balms to her broken heart. They end up lying back on the pillows together and the sexual tension grows as the virgin rape victim and the twenty-five year old man with lots of experience behind him are reminded that lovemaking was meant to be shared with someone special. They start kissing but Sean cuts it short before he loses control. Tara agrees they'd better set some ground rules in their relationship and they return to their separate sleeping areas.
Next day is Sunday. Sean attends his meetings. Tara stays behind to read church magazines and take a nap. She wakes up when Sean enters and reports the most amazing dream about her situation. She dreamed of an infertile couple holding each other and crying, just like her and Sean, but for opposite reasons. They can't have a baby. Tara knows what she has to do now and Sean is completely supportive of her decision to place the baby for adoption.
She gets a priesthood blessing from her home teachers that evening and even though no one but Sean knows her circumstances, the Lord does and Tara is told she'll be blessed for her obedience and sacrifice; she is still a pure and virtuous daughter in His eyes. (Tara's home teachers are idiots if they haven't figured out Tara's situation by now.)
Sean drives her to the temple to officially propose and Tara accepts over lunch the next day. Just in time, Sean will be spending the Thanksgiving holiday in Colorado meeting Tara's parents and family. They are packing to leave when Tara steps out of Sean's apartment to run an errand. Sean answers the door to find Melissa James (we met her in the last book) who is passing through from California and stopped by to see him. She's been thinking maybe she was wrong choosing a career and high paying job over his marriage proposal. She realizes now just how difficult and frustrating it is for a single, successful, career woman to find a straight, single, man willing to commit to marriage and family formation. Tara walks in and Melissa realizes it's already too late. She's a good sport, congratulating them and is pleased to be the first person to know about their engagement. She exits as fast as she can. Tara and Sean shrug and get back to their new life together.
Chapter 8- When they pull up outside the farmhouse, Mary Parr comes running out to welcome them with open arms. George Parr joins them at the dinner table where Sean and Tara enjoy a home cooked meal. Everyone gathers in the front room afterwards to visit.
Tara's parents are delighted with Sean and thrilled to hear the young couple are serious enough to want to get married but confused when they learn the date is set for December 28. Tara blurts out it's because she's pregnant and her parents almost hit the ceiling before Tara adds that Sean is not the father, but he'll always be her (and the reader's) hero for being so willing to let everyone believe he is the child's father and doing right by marrying her. (Hard to believe everyone back at BYU is still ignorant of the situation.) Tara bursts into tears as her noble fiancé fills in the details which includes the word "rape" to which her parents react by clutching their pearls.
Once everyone calms down, they realize they have a wedding to plan and the Parr family will do everything they can to make it a simple, discreet, but memorable occasion for their daughter and future son-in-law. The bishop will marry them here and everyone can think what they like. The baby will be placed for adoption. Tara's parents agree it is the right thing to do.
Chapter 9- The next day is Thanksgiving. Tara has two siblings. Debbie is a happily married-with-kids-Mormon-housewife while brother Larry is still single and not coming home for the holidays. Sean sleeps in the guest bedroom and everyone has just finished breakfast when Debbie and her family arrive.
Tara and Debbie go upstairs to talk privately about what happened to Tara. They emerge crying and Debbie kisses Sean because he really is too good to be true. Thanksgiving dinner is delicious and Sean feels right at home with his new family.
Black Friday (Thursday?) does not exist in this world. Instead, everyone bundles up and spends Friday afternoon playing in the snow with hot chocolate and sandwiches served by Mary afterwards. Debbie's family leaves and that evening the two couples, young and old, put on ancient vinyl records and close the generation gap by exchanging dances in the living room.
Saturday, Sean helps George tend the sheep. Sunday, they all attend church where Sean and Tara talk to Tara's bishop who is very understanding and helpful; producing scriptures and counsel re-emphasizing that Tara is not to blame for what happened.
Back in Provo, the bishop of Sean's BYU student ward, the ward they plan to attend after they marry, is not so compassionate. He feels they should wait until after Tara has delivered her (bastard) baby before tying the knot and getting sealed in the temple. Sean wants to bite his head off but Tara stops him with a look. Poor man is probably overwhelmed by so many frustrated single women in his care when there just aren't enough men, like Sean, on the roster to meet their demands. Tara knows she is highly favored of the Lord.
The remaining weeks to Christmas fly by and before they know it, Sean and Tara are driving back to rural Colorado for the big day. The holiday is spent singing Christmas carols, baking, tramping out into the wilderness to cut down a tree, hanging stockings with Debbie and her young children and reading the Bible story together. It is one of the best Eve's of Sean's life. Christmas Day pales in comparison to the wedding three days later. The church cultural hall is decorated in red and green decor with a Festival of Trees theme thanks to members of the community donating their Christmas trees for the reception.
Mary Parr cries and kisses her daughter as she helps Tara into her gown because everything is going to be all right from now on. Sean is good, kind and crazy about her. What more could a woman want on her wedding day?
Chapter 10- After the ceremony, Sean spies a woman standing apart from the other guests at the open reception. Sean's favorite older sister, the sibling he's always been closest to, was the only family member to make the effort to attend his wedding. He is overjoyed to see her. Tara is just relieved Maureen isn't more competition to deal with. Maureen is happily married with a daughter and, though not a Mormon, she was also supportive of Sean's decision to leave the family faith despite Dad's opposition; he refused to acknowledge he has a son when the announcement arrived and has threatened to cut off anyone who even tries to contact Sean. Their mother isn't doing well and Maureen will be sure to pass on Sean's love when she returns to Chicago. She's brought a box of Sean things along with news of his four brothers and sisters: one is taking her vows, another sister is still living with that man in Manhattan, pregnant with another of his babies; no ring in sight, his oldest brother, Robert, is openly gay, another brother is married now with a wife and three kids and doing well. Their father has no problem with any of these lifestyles. Sean is the only one disowned.
Sean and Tara spend their wedding night at a quaint bed and breakfast several miles up the road. Tara is understandably nervous about consummating their relationship, but Sean gives her a wonderful speech about overcoming trials and developing trust. He'll give Tara all the time she needs tonight. It doesn't take long. Once they get started, Sean turns out to be the most patient, passionate, lover Tara's ever met.
Chapter 11- After a night of vigorous lovemaking, Tara and Sean lie in bed and chat about Sean's numerous scars from all the accident related surgeries he underwent. They check out and return to the farmhouse for "Christmas Part II" opening wedding gifts. New Years Eve is spent in Provo with an open house to celebrate the recent wedding.
Next day company arrives from Salt Lake. Melissa's happily married, stay-at-home Mormon homemaker sister, Ilene and her hubby Bryson with all their children including a six week old baby, the sight of which is almost too much for Tara. Since neither they nor Melissa, already on her way back to California, could make it to the party last night, Ilene and Bryson are here with wedding gifts. Bryson makes it clear he doesn't think much of his sister-in-law who needs to settle down and find some poor guy to marry her. (It'll be fun to see him eat his words in the next book!)
They leave and Sean and Tara open their gifts. Melissa sent them (tacky) blue glasses Sean recognizes from when they dated, purchased with the intention of using them on their honeymoon. The other is a new toaster. Just what they've been needing.
That Sunday, a single woman in their student ward makes an insensitive, snarky comment to Tara about how preggers she looks, and so soon after her wedding too. (Why Sean and Tara didn't get their records moved to the married student ward by now is baffling. In 2011 the Mormon church dropped student wards for the all-encompassing YSA, Young Single Adult, wards.) Sean requests the transfer of their records to a regular family ward. Problem solved.
February arrives and Sean answers the phone to learn Michael and Emily Hamilton are flying out from Australia specifically to see them and meet Tara in person. Michael and Emily prove what great friends they are by taking them out to a nice dinner at Mullboons (a locally owned steakhouse chain with two locations in Salt Lake and Provo which went bankrupt in the late 90's). Michael and Emily want to stop by tomorrow for another visit. Sean warns them he and Tara might be out running errands but they are welcome to let themselves in until they return which is exactly what happens the next day.
Tara enters the apartment, carrying groceries, complaining over her shoulder about her condition to Sean to find Emily sitting on the couch. Tara flees the room in embarrassment. Later, Michael and Emily sit them both down to discuss the situation without any judgement or condescension. On the contrary, they consider Sean and Tara family and want to do all they can to help, especially financially which Sean admits they could use since his job doesn't cover medical insurance for both of them. Emily takes Tara shopping while Michael prepares dinner for them and they have a nice evening. Before they leave, Michael and Emily insist on paying for a future, TBD, trip to visit them in Australia which they graciously accept. The wind howls outside one night while they make love in their own little bubble and Tara is beginning to believe she can face anything.
One day in March, Tara serves Sean a rather unappetizing breakfast with everything: pancakes, eggs and milk all colored green. Dinner is baked chicken with a green coating, mashed potatoes, gravy and cake all dyed green. (Sounds gross but it's the thought that counts.) Tara decks herself out all in green because Sean once told her he celebrates St. Patrick's Day religiously. For Sean, newlywed life is bliss.
As Tara's baby bump expands, she knows it's time to get serious about the adoption proceedings. They meet with LDS social services (which, as of 2014, are no longer operating as a full service adoption agency, just counseling for unwed mothers which shows just how much the social pressure towards premarital sex has changed since this book was published) and Tara begins to realize giving up this new life growing inside her will be one of the hardest trials she's ever faced. Lucky she has Sean to carry her through.
Chapter 12- For the first time in an Anita Stansfield novel, POV switches to a new character. Meet Veronica Raine. Happily married to Matthew for eight years, she is unable to have children which breaks her heart. Matthew is like a rock in his support of their shared grief for a family as they have experienced many disappointments over the years with adoptions that have fallen through thanks to birth mothers choosing to keep their babies. They live on a ranch in central Utah, three hours away from Provo, their nearest city. Matthew works his ranch while Veronica has a job working from home on her computer. Though God-fearing people, they are not members of any organized religion and have no desire to affiliate with such but Veronica's yearning for a baby has gotten her thinking maybe they should start seeking some divine intervention by attending a church somewhere. They are the perfect "Golden Investigators."
Meanwhile, back in Provo, Tara is getting discouraged as every adoption candidate file she looks at feels wrong. In tears, she leaves LDS social services and causes a fender bender waking up in a moving ambulance. She'll be okay and the baby is fine but emergency responders wanted to bring her in for overnight observation, just to be safe. Sean enters her hospital room and is glad to learn Tara is fine. Then, another woman enters the room, introducing herself as Diane Hayne. She was the other driver but she's not here to press charges, just being a good neighbor, but when Sean and Tara learn she works for an adoption lawyer, they know this was no accident.
Spring term ends and both Sean and Tara celebrate passing all their classes by treating themselves to a nice dinner where Danny just happens to enter with his date. He never sees them as Tara excuses herself and Sean takes her home; Tara is that upset. After dropping her off at their apartment, Sean returns to the restaurant and confronts Danny in the parking lot. Danny refuses to admit he did anything wrong. Tara led him on and they got carried away, that's all. It's Tara's own fault she got knocked up. Sean delivers a well-aimed blow to Danny's jaw and readers cheer. True colors revealed, Danny picks himself up and drives away, abandoning his date. Sean gallantly gives the young woman a quarter (how did we ever survive without our electronic devices?) for the payphone and keeps her company until her roommate can come pick her up.
Back at their apartment, learning what Sean did in her behalf, Tara finds it hard to stay angry.
Chapter 13- May is here. Tara won't be taking any more classes until the baby arrives but Sean is feeling the stress of his senior year and all the preparation required so he can graduate next year. A letter from Maureen reveals their mother has been diagnosed with terminal cancer. Sean and Tara hit the road for Illinois immediately. They pull up in front of a beautiful old home in a respectable Chicago suburb. Maureen answers the door. Perfect timing as Dad just stepped out and their mother, Helen, is having a good day today; she is alert and coherent. Sean and Tara go upstairs where Helen weeps thinking her prodigal son is a hallucination but Sean reassures her he's well and happily married. Joining the Mormon church was all worth it and he even had the opportunity to visit the Old Country for two years. Tara leaves them to catch up and is comfortably settled on the couch when an older, distinguished looking man with graying hair and even thicker brogue than his wife, enters the house. Seeing Tara, he compliments her on her beauty and introduces himself as Brian O'Hara. Tara can see where Sean got his charisma and good looks. Before Tara can reveal herself, Sean descends and the temperature in the room instantly plummets. Now that he's seen his dying mother, Brian orders Sean out of his house for he'll have nothing to do with any "heathin' Mormons." Sean reminds his father he always upheld the values Brain taught him which he always did his best to follow, yet his own father turned him out, penniless and crippled. He points out Brian's hypocrisy accepting his other children's questionable lifestyles, like Robert, while he's always done his best, since his conversion to his new faith, to be a good Christian husband and provider to his family. Brian again orders him to leave, then turns and leaves the room while Sean, tears streaming down his face, tells his father that families are supposed to be together and that he loves him (yes, he's the first to say it).
They check into a motel where Sean cries in Tara's arms which leads to making love. After the passion subsides, they leave to find some dinner which provides the energy they need to make love again. Next morning Maureen calls to inform them Helen just passed away and Brian is willing to honor his late wife's deathbed request that Sean be allowed to attend the funeral and be one of the pallbearers. Tara and Sean attend the funeral but keep a respectful distance from the family to avoid any contention. Sean resolves to do his mother's temple work as soon as it's allowed.
Chapter 14- Tara announces her final decision on an adoption couple. They're not members of the church but Tara just knows these are the people she saw in her dream. Meanwhile, back on the ranch, Veronica and Matthew receive a phone call informing them a Mormon birth mother has chosen them as recipients. Learning this is a rape victim makes the request for them to investigate her Mormon religion easier. No one is pushing them to become Mormons. The birth mother just wants them to be more informed. They agree to receiving some Mormon proselyting literature and promise to read it with an open mind.
When the mail arrives, Matthew stays up all night reading the Book of Mormon. Veronica is also accepting of these new ideas, both are relieved to learn there's a lot more to this religion than having multiple wives. They attend a local Mormon church and drive to Provo to personally inform their lawyer they'd like to meet with the missionaries and take the discussions. They drive further north to Salt Lake City, tour Temple Square, view the large Christus statue in the North visitors center and feel the spirit.
Back in Provo, Tara is unable to sleep, crying silent tears until Sean wakes up and comforts her. Tara admits there are times she wishes she'd just gotten that abortion after all. Hearing this, Sean gets very upset. There's a story from his past he never shared with Tara about the woman he lived with after moving out of his parent's house. She became pregnant. After realizing his boys can swim, Sean was ready to make an honest woman out of her, but she went out and got an abortion without blinking an eye. Feeling more alone than he ever has before (she's a brick and he's drowning slowly) he moved out the next day. This was what led him to drinking, drugs and getting into that drunk woman's car on that fatal night that changed his life. He sees this as a chance to redeem himself. Tara holds him as he cries and they both understand better why they are facing this trial.
Diane Hayne stops by the next day. She has a fifteen year old daughter, JannaLyn, (who will star in her own future book) her only child after her husband divorced her. Janna has become depressed, withdrawn, refusing to talk. Diane is hoping maybe Sean could help. He is happy to do it without any pay.
Chapter 15- Sean discovers JannaLyn was sexually abused by her biological father during a brief visiting period he made when she was younger. He refers her to Tara who takes the teen out for lunch and shopping. JannaLyn jabbers happily about a boy in her life, Colin Trevor, the stake president's son, who makes up for all the recent suffering she's been through. Progress is made and Diane is grateful. Sean is going to make a wonderful counselor.
Summer is here. Tara wakes up one night with labor pains. Her water broke. It's time! Anticipation is high as they arrive at the hospital while Veronica and Matthew are already on the road to Provo with an empty baby car seat. Complications result in a C-section, a blessing to Tara who dreaded seeing her newborn baby and had planned to keep her eyes closed anyway. Sean is by her side when she wakes up. He reports seeing a couple cooing and admiring Tara's baby (who bares an uncanny resemblance to Danny) through the nursery window. It's all over and now they can take that second honeymoon Sean promised her. They even move to a new apartment in a new ward so they can truly put the past behind them and start anew.
Fall classes begin and Tara is enrolled. The holiday season passes. A touching letter of gratitude arrives in March from the adoption couple. They named him Johsua and he is the best thing that ever happened to them. This comforts Tara, who, for some reason has been unable to concieve. Sean worries his past drug use might be to blame but they resolve to have faith and keep trying.
Chapter 16- The night before Sean walks, Tara answers the door and is very surprised to see Brian O'Hara and Maureen standing on the threshold. Brian is a humble and penitent man. Robert died of AIDS and Brian wasn't even informed until afterwards. This came as a great shock to him and he realizes now how wrong he was letting his Irish pride and stubbornness drive his family away. He is very proud of Sean and wants to show his support tomorrow as Sean receives his Masters degree.
It is a very pleasant visit. Following commencement, Brian treats them all to a nice lunch. Sean and Tara take them to Salt Lake City where they tour Temple Square, view the large Christus statue in the North visitors center and feel the spirit. Brian turns to Sean and, with tears streaming down his face, begs his forgiveness. Father and son fall into each other's arms.
Over dinner at a nice restaurant, Brian kindly inquires after the baby. Sean and Tara let him believe it was a miscarriage.
By June, Sean and Tara are flying to Australia to visit the Hamiltons. Tara reads her scriptures when a passage about the Savior's grace jumps out at her and everything falls into place. The heart wrenching pain she experienced after what happened to her is gone and if she had to do it all over again she would. It is especially easy for her now, because, as she leans over and whispers the news to Sean, she is pregnant with their first child and can all live happily ever after.
The End
The next night, Tara is already beginning to wish she'd taken Sean's advice as she realizes she and Danny have nothing in common. During intermission, Tara mentions she's met someone and can't wait to get more serious. Danny is cold and silent as he drives her home. Unexpectedly, he turns onto a canyon road and drives several miles at a dangerous speed while Tara pleads for him to turn around and take her home. He pulls over and sexually assaults her with a kiss that would put Christian Grey to shame.
Tara jumps out and tries to run but Danny tackles her, physically restrains her and has his way with her. He literally dumps Tara on the strip of lawn outside her apartment and speeds away while Tara is still trying to overcome the shock and horror of what just happened.
Despite all her resolve to remain morally clean, chaste and modest, she has been defiled. Despite all her efforts to fight Danny off, ("No" really did mean "No" in this case) he sneered at her in the car and told her no one would believe her word against his and Tara knows Danny is right. She is too humiliated. No one must ever find out.
She stumbles into her apartment, grateful all her roommates are asleep and that the girl she shares her bedroom with is out of town visiting family for the week so she can crawl into bed and cry herself to sleep. She barricades herself in her room all the following Wednesday, telling everyone she has the flu and just wants to be left alone so she can sleep it off.
Meanwhile, Sean didn't sleep a wink last night. Tara didn't show up for class that day and won't come to the phone. He goes to bed, reflecting on the worst period of his life when drugs, alcohol and cohabitation messed up his life before he got into that woman's car on that fatal night, both of them very drunk.
Chapter 3- Tara does talk to her mom when she calls Thursday morning but continues to lie and say she has the flu. Her family lives in Colorado on a sheep ranch and she is a lifelong member of the church. Sean also comes knocking that day while everyone is out but Tara won't let him in, pleading her zombie-like appearance might scare him away. She promises she'll be in class tomorrow.
Noticing her shiner, Sean corners Tara after Friday's class and Tara breaks down, sobbing in his arms while Sean guides her outside to his truck. He drives her to his apartment so they can talk.
He loves her (yes, he's the first one to say it). He's been worried sick about her. This was no flu. Tara has every textbook symptom of a rape victim: bruises on her neck and wrists, anxiety, depression, every time he tries to get close and learn the truth she becomes aggressive, like a wounded animal.
Tara sobs and sobs, insisting Danny got physically aggressive with her, knocked her around a little and when she insisted he take her home, he did. That's all that happened and she'll never see him again. It's over and Tara just wants to forget the whole thing.
Tara cries herself out and finally allows Sean to take her in his arms and hold her tenderly. It is past lunchtime. Sean goes out to get some food and cries, alone, in his truck, for the woman he loves who did nothing wrong and is hurting for no good reason. He resists the urge to hunt Danny down and avenge his Tara.
Chapter 4- Sean returns with pizza, drinks and a dozen pink roses. They eat and watch Gone With the Wind. Tara can feel the healing beginning already thanks to Sean's gentle concern and care. He still wants to marry her and Tara finds herself believing it might actually happen.
Sean takes her home, it is very late, but her roommates are all up entertaining the one and only single college boy in their complex they could coerce into joining them for dinner and a round of Monopoly on a Friday night (Why date one when you can hang out with them all? Elder Oaks famous talk-given ten years too late!) Sean makes a date for tomorrow and Tara accepts because, apparently, she has no other life outside BYU, like a job.
Chapter 5- Sean picks Tara up early that Saturday morning and they drive to Temple Square in Salt Lake City. Sean parks at Crossroads Mall (torn down in 2007 and replaced by City Creek Center) where they browse stores and eat lunch in the food court on the lowest level. They tour Temple Square, view the large Christus statue in the North visitors center and feel the spirit.
Over dinner at a nice restaurant, Sean opens up about the choices he made and the lifestyle he led before the car accident that led him to join the church and turn his life around. Tara knows she's found a keeper.
Back at her apartment, Sean breaks an important BYU honor code rule and hangs out in Tara's bedroom, unchaperoned, while her roommates lounge in the front room, watching TV and studying. They make a date for church tomorrow, Sean's ward this time. Tara sees him out where she allows Sean to give her a chaste kiss on her forehead. What a sweetheart.
By November, these two have become inseparable. Sean fixes Tara's car. Tara is given a key and practically lives at Sean's cooking his meals and welcoming him home after a long day of classes or work but she keeps her own bed at her apartment. Their relationship will remain platonic until their wedding night but they enjoy kissing and cuddling as Tara's vulnerability dissipates. One day, Sean suggests they spend the rest of their lives together. Realizing her new name will sound very silly, Tara teases Sean O'Hara with timid hesitation at accepting before she admits he had her at hello. She's in love and ready to move on. She'll go by Taralee for the record. They kiss and the nightmare of Danny is the furthest thing from Tara's mind.
Chapter 6- The Friday before Thanksgiving, Tara wakes up with morning sickness. When it happens again the next day there's no denying it. She's pregnant and Danny is the father.
Tara leaves the apartment and starts walking in the freezing sleet. She ends up at Sean's apartment, soaking wet. Sean orders her into a hot shower, finds dry clothes that fit her small frame and helps her dry her hair with the blow dryer (How many single men in the 90's owned a hair dryer?). It's a very romantic gesture as he stands behind her, letting his fingers toy in her long curls but his attempt to brush her hair quickly becomes awkward until Tara wordlessly takes over.
Now it's time to talk and it doesn't take much prodding from Sean to get the truth out of Tara who has another meltdown. For the first time in the novel the word "rape" is spoken aloud after Sean puts two and two together. He's furious with Danny while Tara howls her grief in his arms before running to the bathroom to be sick.
Both manage to calm down and discuss the situation rationally. Tara's mom phones looking for her daughter and Tara knows she's lucky to have a mother so in tune with the spirit. She'll continue to withhold the truth from her family and roommates but knows she'll have to start talking soon. Sean is a good place to start and Tara finally opens up and tells him everything that happened that night. He's got her back, repeating over and over that this is not her fault; he still loves her and wants to be with her. The baby is due in July and abortion is out but Tara is open to adoption. Sean will support her whatever decision she makes and be there every step of the way.
Chapter 7- Tara cries herself to sleep in Sean's arms and wakes up in his bed while Sean took the couch (proving that in the world of Anita Stansfield, chivalry is not dead). Around 3am Sean hears Tara groaning in the throngs of a nightmare. He wakes her. At first she is frightened and disoriented, fighting him off before collapsing in his arms, sobbing, while Sean whispers soothing, comforting balms to her broken heart. They end up lying back on the pillows together and the sexual tension grows as the virgin rape victim and the twenty-five year old man with lots of experience behind him are reminded that lovemaking was meant to be shared with someone special. They start kissing but Sean cuts it short before he loses control. Tara agrees they'd better set some ground rules in their relationship and they return to their separate sleeping areas.
Next day is Sunday. Sean attends his meetings. Tara stays behind to read church magazines and take a nap. She wakes up when Sean enters and reports the most amazing dream about her situation. She dreamed of an infertile couple holding each other and crying, just like her and Sean, but for opposite reasons. They can't have a baby. Tara knows what she has to do now and Sean is completely supportive of her decision to place the baby for adoption.
She gets a priesthood blessing from her home teachers that evening and even though no one but Sean knows her circumstances, the Lord does and Tara is told she'll be blessed for her obedience and sacrifice; she is still a pure and virtuous daughter in His eyes. (Tara's home teachers are idiots if they haven't figured out Tara's situation by now.)
Sean drives her to the temple to officially propose and Tara accepts over lunch the next day. Just in time, Sean will be spending the Thanksgiving holiday in Colorado meeting Tara's parents and family. They are packing to leave when Tara steps out of Sean's apartment to run an errand. Sean answers the door to find Melissa James (we met her in the last book) who is passing through from California and stopped by to see him. She's been thinking maybe she was wrong choosing a career and high paying job over his marriage proposal. She realizes now just how difficult and frustrating it is for a single, successful, career woman to find a straight, single, man willing to commit to marriage and family formation. Tara walks in and Melissa realizes it's already too late. She's a good sport, congratulating them and is pleased to be the first person to know about their engagement. She exits as fast as she can. Tara and Sean shrug and get back to their new life together.
Chapter 8- When they pull up outside the farmhouse, Mary Parr comes running out to welcome them with open arms. George Parr joins them at the dinner table where Sean and Tara enjoy a home cooked meal. Everyone gathers in the front room afterwards to visit.
Tara's parents are delighted with Sean and thrilled to hear the young couple are serious enough to want to get married but confused when they learn the date is set for December 28. Tara blurts out it's because she's pregnant and her parents almost hit the ceiling before Tara adds that Sean is not the father, but he'll always be her (and the reader's) hero for being so willing to let everyone believe he is the child's father and doing right by marrying her. (Hard to believe everyone back at BYU is still ignorant of the situation.) Tara bursts into tears as her noble fiancé fills in the details which includes the word "rape" to which her parents react by clutching their pearls.
Once everyone calms down, they realize they have a wedding to plan and the Parr family will do everything they can to make it a simple, discreet, but memorable occasion for their daughter and future son-in-law. The bishop will marry them here and everyone can think what they like. The baby will be placed for adoption. Tara's parents agree it is the right thing to do.
Chapter 9- The next day is Thanksgiving. Tara has two siblings. Debbie is a happily married-with-kids-Mormon-housewife while brother Larry is still single and not coming home for the holidays. Sean sleeps in the guest bedroom and everyone has just finished breakfast when Debbie and her family arrive.
Tara and Debbie go upstairs to talk privately about what happened to Tara. They emerge crying and Debbie kisses Sean because he really is too good to be true. Thanksgiving dinner is delicious and Sean feels right at home with his new family.
Black Friday (Thursday?) does not exist in this world. Instead, everyone bundles up and spends Friday afternoon playing in the snow with hot chocolate and sandwiches served by Mary afterwards. Debbie's family leaves and that evening the two couples, young and old, put on ancient vinyl records and close the generation gap by exchanging dances in the living room.
Saturday, Sean helps George tend the sheep. Sunday, they all attend church where Sean and Tara talk to Tara's bishop who is very understanding and helpful; producing scriptures and counsel re-emphasizing that Tara is not to blame for what happened.
Back in Provo, the bishop of Sean's BYU student ward, the ward they plan to attend after they marry, is not so compassionate. He feels they should wait until after Tara has delivered her (bastard) baby before tying the knot and getting sealed in the temple. Sean wants to bite his head off but Tara stops him with a look. Poor man is probably overwhelmed by so many frustrated single women in his care when there just aren't enough men, like Sean, on the roster to meet their demands. Tara knows she is highly favored of the Lord.
The remaining weeks to Christmas fly by and before they know it, Sean and Tara are driving back to rural Colorado for the big day. The holiday is spent singing Christmas carols, baking, tramping out into the wilderness to cut down a tree, hanging stockings with Debbie and her young children and reading the Bible story together. It is one of the best Eve's of Sean's life. Christmas Day pales in comparison to the wedding three days later. The church cultural hall is decorated in red and green decor with a Festival of Trees theme thanks to members of the community donating their Christmas trees for the reception.
Mary Parr cries and kisses her daughter as she helps Tara into her gown because everything is going to be all right from now on. Sean is good, kind and crazy about her. What more could a woman want on her wedding day?
Chapter 10- After the ceremony, Sean spies a woman standing apart from the other guests at the open reception. Sean's favorite older sister, the sibling he's always been closest to, was the only family member to make the effort to attend his wedding. He is overjoyed to see her. Tara is just relieved Maureen isn't more competition to deal with. Maureen is happily married with a daughter and, though not a Mormon, she was also supportive of Sean's decision to leave the family faith despite Dad's opposition; he refused to acknowledge he has a son when the announcement arrived and has threatened to cut off anyone who even tries to contact Sean. Their mother isn't doing well and Maureen will be sure to pass on Sean's love when she returns to Chicago. She's brought a box of Sean things along with news of his four brothers and sisters: one is taking her vows, another sister is still living with that man in Manhattan, pregnant with another of his babies; no ring in sight, his oldest brother, Robert, is openly gay, another brother is married now with a wife and three kids and doing well. Their father has no problem with any of these lifestyles. Sean is the only one disowned.
Sean and Tara spend their wedding night at a quaint bed and breakfast several miles up the road. Tara is understandably nervous about consummating their relationship, but Sean gives her a wonderful speech about overcoming trials and developing trust. He'll give Tara all the time she needs tonight. It doesn't take long. Once they get started, Sean turns out to be the most patient, passionate, lover Tara's ever met.
Chapter 11- After a night of vigorous lovemaking, Tara and Sean lie in bed and chat about Sean's numerous scars from all the accident related surgeries he underwent. They check out and return to the farmhouse for "Christmas Part II" opening wedding gifts. New Years Eve is spent in Provo with an open house to celebrate the recent wedding.
Next day company arrives from Salt Lake. Melissa's happily married, stay-at-home Mormon homemaker sister, Ilene and her hubby Bryson with all their children including a six week old baby, the sight of which is almost too much for Tara. Since neither they nor Melissa, already on her way back to California, could make it to the party last night, Ilene and Bryson are here with wedding gifts. Bryson makes it clear he doesn't think much of his sister-in-law who needs to settle down and find some poor guy to marry her. (It'll be fun to see him eat his words in the next book!)
They leave and Sean and Tara open their gifts. Melissa sent them (tacky) blue glasses Sean recognizes from when they dated, purchased with the intention of using them on their honeymoon. The other is a new toaster. Just what they've been needing.
That Sunday, a single woman in their student ward makes an insensitive, snarky comment to Tara about how preggers she looks, and so soon after her wedding too. (Why Sean and Tara didn't get their records moved to the married student ward by now is baffling. In 2011 the Mormon church dropped student wards for the all-encompassing YSA, Young Single Adult, wards.) Sean requests the transfer of their records to a regular family ward. Problem solved.
February arrives and Sean answers the phone to learn Michael and Emily Hamilton are flying out from Australia specifically to see them and meet Tara in person. Michael and Emily prove what great friends they are by taking them out to a nice dinner at Mullboons (a locally owned steakhouse chain with two locations in Salt Lake and Provo which went bankrupt in the late 90's). Michael and Emily want to stop by tomorrow for another visit. Sean warns them he and Tara might be out running errands but they are welcome to let themselves in until they return which is exactly what happens the next day.
Tara enters the apartment, carrying groceries, complaining over her shoulder about her condition to Sean to find Emily sitting on the couch. Tara flees the room in embarrassment. Later, Michael and Emily sit them both down to discuss the situation without any judgement or condescension. On the contrary, they consider Sean and Tara family and want to do all they can to help, especially financially which Sean admits they could use since his job doesn't cover medical insurance for both of them. Emily takes Tara shopping while Michael prepares dinner for them and they have a nice evening. Before they leave, Michael and Emily insist on paying for a future, TBD, trip to visit them in Australia which they graciously accept. The wind howls outside one night while they make love in their own little bubble and Tara is beginning to believe she can face anything.
One day in March, Tara serves Sean a rather unappetizing breakfast with everything: pancakes, eggs and milk all colored green. Dinner is baked chicken with a green coating, mashed potatoes, gravy and cake all dyed green. (Sounds gross but it's the thought that counts.) Tara decks herself out all in green because Sean once told her he celebrates St. Patrick's Day religiously. For Sean, newlywed life is bliss.
As Tara's baby bump expands, she knows it's time to get serious about the adoption proceedings. They meet with LDS social services (which, as of 2014, are no longer operating as a full service adoption agency, just counseling for unwed mothers which shows just how much the social pressure towards premarital sex has changed since this book was published) and Tara begins to realize giving up this new life growing inside her will be one of the hardest trials she's ever faced. Lucky she has Sean to carry her through.
Chapter 12- For the first time in an Anita Stansfield novel, POV switches to a new character. Meet Veronica Raine. Happily married to Matthew for eight years, she is unable to have children which breaks her heart. Matthew is like a rock in his support of their shared grief for a family as they have experienced many disappointments over the years with adoptions that have fallen through thanks to birth mothers choosing to keep their babies. They live on a ranch in central Utah, three hours away from Provo, their nearest city. Matthew works his ranch while Veronica has a job working from home on her computer. Though God-fearing people, they are not members of any organized religion and have no desire to affiliate with such but Veronica's yearning for a baby has gotten her thinking maybe they should start seeking some divine intervention by attending a church somewhere. They are the perfect "Golden Investigators."
Meanwhile, back in Provo, Tara is getting discouraged as every adoption candidate file she looks at feels wrong. In tears, she leaves LDS social services and causes a fender bender waking up in a moving ambulance. She'll be okay and the baby is fine but emergency responders wanted to bring her in for overnight observation, just to be safe. Sean enters her hospital room and is glad to learn Tara is fine. Then, another woman enters the room, introducing herself as Diane Hayne. She was the other driver but she's not here to press charges, just being a good neighbor, but when Sean and Tara learn she works for an adoption lawyer, they know this was no accident.
Spring term ends and both Sean and Tara celebrate passing all their classes by treating themselves to a nice dinner where Danny just happens to enter with his date. He never sees them as Tara excuses herself and Sean takes her home; Tara is that upset. After dropping her off at their apartment, Sean returns to the restaurant and confronts Danny in the parking lot. Danny refuses to admit he did anything wrong. Tara led him on and they got carried away, that's all. It's Tara's own fault she got knocked up. Sean delivers a well-aimed blow to Danny's jaw and readers cheer. True colors revealed, Danny picks himself up and drives away, abandoning his date. Sean gallantly gives the young woman a quarter (how did we ever survive without our electronic devices?) for the payphone and keeps her company until her roommate can come pick her up.
Back at their apartment, learning what Sean did in her behalf, Tara finds it hard to stay angry.
Chapter 13- May is here. Tara won't be taking any more classes until the baby arrives but Sean is feeling the stress of his senior year and all the preparation required so he can graduate next year. A letter from Maureen reveals their mother has been diagnosed with terminal cancer. Sean and Tara hit the road for Illinois immediately. They pull up in front of a beautiful old home in a respectable Chicago suburb. Maureen answers the door. Perfect timing as Dad just stepped out and their mother, Helen, is having a good day today; she is alert and coherent. Sean and Tara go upstairs where Helen weeps thinking her prodigal son is a hallucination but Sean reassures her he's well and happily married. Joining the Mormon church was all worth it and he even had the opportunity to visit the Old Country for two years. Tara leaves them to catch up and is comfortably settled on the couch when an older, distinguished looking man with graying hair and even thicker brogue than his wife, enters the house. Seeing Tara, he compliments her on her beauty and introduces himself as Brian O'Hara. Tara can see where Sean got his charisma and good looks. Before Tara can reveal herself, Sean descends and the temperature in the room instantly plummets. Now that he's seen his dying mother, Brian orders Sean out of his house for he'll have nothing to do with any "heathin' Mormons." Sean reminds his father he always upheld the values Brain taught him which he always did his best to follow, yet his own father turned him out, penniless and crippled. He points out Brian's hypocrisy accepting his other children's questionable lifestyles, like Robert, while he's always done his best, since his conversion to his new faith, to be a good Christian husband and provider to his family. Brian again orders him to leave, then turns and leaves the room while Sean, tears streaming down his face, tells his father that families are supposed to be together and that he loves him (yes, he's the first to say it).
They check into a motel where Sean cries in Tara's arms which leads to making love. After the passion subsides, they leave to find some dinner which provides the energy they need to make love again. Next morning Maureen calls to inform them Helen just passed away and Brian is willing to honor his late wife's deathbed request that Sean be allowed to attend the funeral and be one of the pallbearers. Tara and Sean attend the funeral but keep a respectful distance from the family to avoid any contention. Sean resolves to do his mother's temple work as soon as it's allowed.
Chapter 14- Tara announces her final decision on an adoption couple. They're not members of the church but Tara just knows these are the people she saw in her dream. Meanwhile, back on the ranch, Veronica and Matthew receive a phone call informing them a Mormon birth mother has chosen them as recipients. Learning this is a rape victim makes the request for them to investigate her Mormon religion easier. No one is pushing them to become Mormons. The birth mother just wants them to be more informed. They agree to receiving some Mormon proselyting literature and promise to read it with an open mind.
When the mail arrives, Matthew stays up all night reading the Book of Mormon. Veronica is also accepting of these new ideas, both are relieved to learn there's a lot more to this religion than having multiple wives. They attend a local Mormon church and drive to Provo to personally inform their lawyer they'd like to meet with the missionaries and take the discussions. They drive further north to Salt Lake City, tour Temple Square, view the large Christus statue in the North visitors center and feel the spirit.
Back in Provo, Tara is unable to sleep, crying silent tears until Sean wakes up and comforts her. Tara admits there are times she wishes she'd just gotten that abortion after all. Hearing this, Sean gets very upset. There's a story from his past he never shared with Tara about the woman he lived with after moving out of his parent's house. She became pregnant. After realizing his boys can swim, Sean was ready to make an honest woman out of her, but she went out and got an abortion without blinking an eye. Feeling more alone than he ever has before (she's a brick and he's drowning slowly) he moved out the next day. This was what led him to drinking, drugs and getting into that drunk woman's car on that fatal night that changed his life. He sees this as a chance to redeem himself. Tara holds him as he cries and they both understand better why they are facing this trial.
Diane Hayne stops by the next day. She has a fifteen year old daughter, JannaLyn, (who will star in her own future book) her only child after her husband divorced her. Janna has become depressed, withdrawn, refusing to talk. Diane is hoping maybe Sean could help. He is happy to do it without any pay.
Chapter 15- Sean discovers JannaLyn was sexually abused by her biological father during a brief visiting period he made when she was younger. He refers her to Tara who takes the teen out for lunch and shopping. JannaLyn jabbers happily about a boy in her life, Colin Trevor, the stake president's son, who makes up for all the recent suffering she's been through. Progress is made and Diane is grateful. Sean is going to make a wonderful counselor.
Summer is here. Tara wakes up one night with labor pains. Her water broke. It's time! Anticipation is high as they arrive at the hospital while Veronica and Matthew are already on the road to Provo with an empty baby car seat. Complications result in a C-section, a blessing to Tara who dreaded seeing her newborn baby and had planned to keep her eyes closed anyway. Sean is by her side when she wakes up. He reports seeing a couple cooing and admiring Tara's baby (who bares an uncanny resemblance to Danny) through the nursery window. It's all over and now they can take that second honeymoon Sean promised her. They even move to a new apartment in a new ward so they can truly put the past behind them and start anew.
Fall classes begin and Tara is enrolled. The holiday season passes. A touching letter of gratitude arrives in March from the adoption couple. They named him Johsua and he is the best thing that ever happened to them. This comforts Tara, who, for some reason has been unable to concieve. Sean worries his past drug use might be to blame but they resolve to have faith and keep trying.
Chapter 16- The night before Sean walks, Tara answers the door and is very surprised to see Brian O'Hara and Maureen standing on the threshold. Brian is a humble and penitent man. Robert died of AIDS and Brian wasn't even informed until afterwards. This came as a great shock to him and he realizes now how wrong he was letting his Irish pride and stubbornness drive his family away. He is very proud of Sean and wants to show his support tomorrow as Sean receives his Masters degree.
It is a very pleasant visit. Following commencement, Brian treats them all to a nice lunch. Sean and Tara take them to Salt Lake City where they tour Temple Square, view the large Christus statue in the North visitors center and feel the spirit. Brian turns to Sean and, with tears streaming down his face, begs his forgiveness. Father and son fall into each other's arms.
Over dinner at a nice restaurant, Brian kindly inquires after the baby. Sean and Tara let him believe it was a miscarriage.
By June, Sean and Tara are flying to Australia to visit the Hamiltons. Tara reads her scriptures when a passage about the Savior's grace jumps out at her and everything falls into place. The heart wrenching pain she experienced after what happened to her is gone and if she had to do it all over again she would. It is especially easy for her now, because, as she leans over and whispers the news to Sean, she is pregnant with their first child and can all live happily ever after.
The End
